Many may know my name but very few know my story. As a matter of fact, there is one man that knows me inside and out, my heavenly father. To be here today writing is a gift for me, to say the least.
My journey to where I am at today with God was everything but easy. Growing up I did a lot of good things and also a lot of bad. My gateway started where my home was said to be, imagine that. To many, I was portrayed as this girl that was spoiled and had everything handed to them on a silver platter. Spoiler alert, my life has been anything but that.
Many may ask how I got to where I am today with my relationship with God? To be very clear, it was not and has not been easy. God has been the one and only person to not leave me in life and my realization of that has changed my life for eternity.
Loss is what threw me into tunnel vision for so many years. I was not taught to rely on God to get me through life’s many struggles. What little bit of God that was introduced to me as a child, came from my brother being persistent in keeping me active in the church. I will always be grateful for that as well as the bad experiences that I have overcome in my journey.
The gateway to my addiction came from the people that loved me. The encouragement came from my own family and friends. So that made it acceptable in my eyes. It was not, let me emphasize. Because of this, I chose to cope with things in my life by using. One thing led to another and then one pill I got from a friend led to more as well as the handfuls of pills given to me by family to cope with watching my father slowly die for two months, which led to more.
My addiction led me to a foreign country where of which I lived for six years, not knowing how to speak or understand for that matter the natives there. For six years I lived with my ungratefulness for what my life had been up to that point. Talking about being blindsided, those six years woke me up until one day I found myself on my knees screaming and crying out to God for help to get me back home. Guess what he did, he picked me up and led me back here to what I believed to be my home. My journey in addiction was anything but easy and I wouldn’t change a thing because that led me to the cross and where I am at today. I have been clean since April 1,2011, currently going strong with no desire to live that life again. I made a promise to God and you can bet I will keep that promise as he has kept his promise to each and everyone on earth. You just gotta believe.